More tranny stories later!
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
