i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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