Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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