she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
