I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
