But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
