I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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