hell yes lets make some ravioli
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
