I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
