I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
