That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
