My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
