Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
so much tequila, so little girl.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
