i think my mom watched the whole time
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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