I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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