Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize