I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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