She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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