I smell stomach acid.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
fuck your aforementioned shoe
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
