do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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