It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
