drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
