No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
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