i think i have herpe
just one?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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