was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
