Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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