what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We had to coat check the pizza.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
