I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
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