Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize
