What did we do last night that was yellow?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
