just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
