Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
