I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You dont lie about slip and slides
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
