just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize