I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
