I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
