stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
