What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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