Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
