it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
