y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
