she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
