If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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