I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
