Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Randomize
