forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
