people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
