: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
