When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
