Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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