The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
